Lazy Day

It’s now 4 pm and I am just now getting of my arse to get “something” done… Scrolling through Facebook and playing games on my phone don’t constitute productivity- – even if I was contemplating next steps in the story.

I need to get out to Walnut Canyon, but damn this wind is horrendous yesterday and today. Tomorrow is supposed to be better, I’m planning on making the trek and taking some pics as well.

I know what my characters are doing next, but I think visiting the actual location will make for better description overall.

ugh.

Description. I am horrible with description. One of my most frequent comments from @jaybederwehl. So much so, that I actually put the comment in there myself so I will know to come back to it

I’ll write more on that tomorrow I think.

Imposter Syndrome

Have you all heard about this?

Here is a definition I found on a Google web search for those who have not yet encountered the term. I believe it’s an Oxford definition (to give credit where credit is due)

im·pos·tor syn·drome

Learn to pronounce

noun

noun: imposter syndrome

the persistent inability to believe that one’s success is deserved or has been legitimately achieved as a result of one’s own efforts or skills.” People suffering from impostor syndrome may be at increased risk of anxiety”

I first heard about this at work from a colleague who attended a conference where this was a topic. It really hit home.

At work I was considered a resident expert on a particular topic for many years, then I started doing something new. New team, new boss, new management chain. All of a sudden, it felt like what I was previously “good” at, wasn’t the way things were done anymore. I guess I entered into the “relic” phase of my career.

I began to wonder and doubt if all the confidence I had in my work was all for naught.

I wonder if it’s the same way with my writing. Am I just kidding myself.

I have a story to tell, but is it worth reading?

What are your thoughts about Imposter Syndrome?

Cheers!

m

Old Dog/New Tricks- Yeah That’s It

I’m not focusing on writing today, well in all honesty I haven’t focused on it for most of this week. Trying to get this blog all prettied up and designed the way I’d like it to look is taking up much of what could be writing time.

That’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it! I’ll refer y’all to the writers adage blog regarding write, write, write. I am fulfilling that directive, but clearly not adding to the pages in the WIP.

Learning everything this wordpress site can do is rather daunting. I am very computer literate, but dang this is all new stuff!!!

So a learnin’ I must go. Yeah old dog- new trick.

woof.

m

also, I may or may not be blogging this weekend. It’s a holiday weekend here in the US. Memorial Day.

A day of remembrance for service men and women who are no longer walking among us.

The Plot Thickens (at least I hope it does)

It’s one thing to have a general idea for a book. It’s totally another thing to start writing it and following the thought process. As mentioned in a previous blog that I tried doing the outline thing and found I wasn’t very successful.

I had outlined what I wanted each chapter to focus on, which characters would be involved. I was pretty impressed with myself- for about 15 minutes. I think I made it through a half of a chapter before I realized I’d already gone off the outline.

I scrapped that plan.

In this book, I’m freestyling again. I have actually no idea where the characters are going, what they’re going to say, do, think etc. In idea will pop into my brain and I start typing it out, deleting multiple times, finding the flow and then run with it.

However, without the overall plan, I wonder if I’m doing myself a disservice. For example, I mentioned in one of the puzzle blogs about a new character knocking on the door (literally- he’s knocking on a door). That’s all well and good, I like Tobias, but now I have a whole new facet to this book and the storyline. It’s not going to bring me off topic, but I have an entirely new avenue to explore.

I’m not writing War and Peace. I can’t have this novel be 200k words. Ask Jay, I have a tendency to get verbose. My word count is hovering at 48k and my characters haven’t even experienced a full twenty-four hours.

I envision a little less cornstarch to thicken my plot.

Have any of you combatted this issue? What’s your preferred writing method. I think narrowing it to fiction would help. I believe outlines for non-fiction might be a little bit easier to adhere to.

Cheers!

m

Four Eyes (are better than none)

Ironically, I do need corrective lenses, but that’s not what this post is about. Today I shall enumerate on my opinion of the value of a writing partner.

When I started the aforementioned novel that is still sitting in my documents folder back in 2008, I had written some short stories of the erotic nature and had received some positive feedback on them. Namely that they were “hot”. Which, as will most forms of erotica/sexual content- that’s what it’s supposed to do. Yay, score one for me! Now I wanted to take that ability and insert it into a novel. I came up with my premise, had my two main characters, three actually. I already had my best supporting character up front and center.

I wasn’t married at the time, and the kids were either already out of the house, over 18, or in bed at a reasonable hour (8 pm) because they were still in grade school. This left me plenty of time to clack at the keys after they went to bed.

So one night I had this idea and started typing. I sent off a page to @jaybederwehl and he said… keep going.

So I did.

This was back when instant messaging was more of a thing and an immediate response to a message was born. Jay and I would write a paragraph, come up with an idea, consider a what if, send it off to one another and continue typing away.

When something worked, we said so, when it didn’t- we said that also. We’ve had eyes on each other’s projects almost from the start and all the way through the process of the book (or books in his case). We developed a working strategy, if we received something to review there are facets to that:

  1. Am I reading for pleasure- to get the flow, gist, etc
  2. Am I reading for proofread- fix grammar, spelling etc
  3. Am I reading for critique- self explanatory.

I can’t tell you how many times Jay brought me back on track, or liked an idea but suggested maybe it should fit elsewhere (and he was right) or something just didn’t fit.

Thankfully Jay and I had already been collaborating on ideas, bantering about writing, the process, the dreams, the fame (hence the dream part). Taking our collaboration one step further was a fairly easy process especially considering we’re on opposite sides of the US.

Still though, having someone look at your baby and critique it is HARD! Even after nearly twenty years (Jay, we’re getting old) I still watch my inbox minute by minute for him to send his comments back. More importantly, I listen to those comments.

That said, my husband still hasn’t read my current manuscript- I’m too chicken for his feedback at this point. That would be like jumping off that cliff in the picture above.

Four eyes = good

Six eyes = not ready for

m

WIP

After reading @JayBederwehl’s blog the other day about the public and private personas, it got me thinking about my own. While I’m a far cry (like three universes) away from having to even consider another notch to a public persona, I still ponder over the changes I’ll have to make. Like creating a bio, getting a photo of me that I feel comfortable with… that in and of itself could take years.

Artists, at least in my opinion, always have a piece of themselves embedded into their craft. Whether it’s appearance, age, gender or non-gender, sexuality, activities, hobbies… the list can go on and on. The point is that purveyors of the works of said artist could quite possibly seek to find the similarities and become completely disillusioned by the real physical person behind the product.

That’s a damn scary thought.

What if someday, I can’t just be “me”?

Monday Musings-Untangled

I did it! Not a single necklace was harmed in the untangling process either. I had a few meetings today where I didn’t have to actively participate, just listen, so I just started pulling at a chain.

I saw the roadblock, and quickly undid the clasp and the chain actually slid out from that knotted mess. One led to another, then another and before I knew it- presto!

Much like what is happening with my latest character introduction. I had no idea I needed this character, but apparently he knew better and now I have a new and much needed path that will get me to the conclusion of this book.

The topic also has me pondering methodology of writing. I know of two

  1. Outline
  2. Freestyling

I tried number one in the previous novel I mentioned the other day. I wasn’t good at it. My chapters inevitably went off topic and it threw the entire outline off.

So instead of trying to make the square peg fit into a round hole, I just stopped. I went to freestyling. I let my characters tell me what they should and should not be doing. Sometimes they choose the wrong path, and that’s where a great writing partner comes in.

But writing partners and beta readers are tomorrow’s discussion. Today I am going to revel in the fact I actually got that mess untangled.

Oh, that and come up with some type of bio. I can bio anyone but myself it seems…. That’s another area where that partner comes in handy. He’s probably better at describing me than I am. (insert chuckle here)

Cheers!

m

Pieces to the Puzzle

Yesterday I briefly mentioned how writing and coming up with a plot is a puzzle. Much like that tangled mess you see in the picture. I had the plethora of necklaces laying flat, in the direct vicinity of an open window, and a red flag day. For anyone not familiar with the Southwest, red flag days are when the winds are uber fast.

Officially this is what weather.gov says:

Primary Red Flag Criteria: 1) Relative humidity of 15% or less combined with sustained surface winds, or frequent gusts, of 25 mph or greater. Both conditions must occur simultaneously for at least 3 hours in a 12 hour period.

and this:

Any combination of weather and fuels conditions that would create a critical fire control situation or extensive wildfire outbreak. These may include: long term drought, much higher than normal maximum temperatures coupled with very low humidity, low fuel moisture, poor nighttime RH recovery, high Energy Release Component (ERC) or Burning Index (BI), a Haines Index of 5 or 6, etc.

Now there’s a bunch of definitions and clarifications in between, but for today’s purposes these two work.

Southwest = severe drought

Anyway, moving on. So not only did my carelessness send the necklaces careening off the counter, but then they were tumbled about en masse and I was left with what you see above.

So in the week since this happened, I’ve slowly removed three necklaces intact. Now if I had to cut the chain and remove the pendant it would not be the end of the world, but what’s the fun in that?

Just as with my book story, I pull one chain and another tightens. I loop and unloop only to discover that I probably should have left the original loop alone. And that one chain I was certain would bind everything up actually allowed another to pull free.

It’s all a puzzle and I don’t have the solution at the ready. I poke and prod. Write a sentence or two. Stop. Pull a thread. Oops that didn’t work. Backspace. Start again. Wait, what if….

BINGO! Another path revealed!!!

I literally had this happen last night after I posted. A new character popped his head (and body) into the storyline. I had no idea he would be there, but it turns out he’s a major part of what’s next.

I LOVE it when my characters knock some sense into me.

Tomorrow… hmmmm Not sure yet.

Monday Musings. that much I know.

Puzzles

One of the things I needed to give me a push was deciding what genre I was going to write. My previous attempt at a novel (still sitting in my editing folder btw, that’s a story for another day) was a crime related mystery with some s.e.x. built in. some raw juicy s.e.x. that wasn’t for the faint of heart. It was let’s say “thematic” not just straight run of the mill vanilla sex.

I do enjoy writing erotica and I had no complaints from my betas (tomorrow’s blog), but there were other parts that were just too drawn out upon deeper reflection.

I was stymied for a very long time and couldn’t seem to move past those two characters. They had something to say and I didn’t completely let them say it. Each attempt to move past them was met with futility and even some guilt for not finishing and publishing. In that one, I think I was my own worst enemy.

BUT, I am an avid reader- of fiction. I have enough reality in my day to day existence that I want to be carried away into pretend land when I pick up a book. And yes, I need to add this disclaimer right now. I have all my books in my nifty little reader.

I do not turn actual paper pages any longer.

Again, a story for another day.

I love reading the urban fantasy these days. I mean I have always- ever since I started chapter books, I’ve gravitated to either mystery or paranormal.

In 2020 I took a week’s vacation from Christmas to New Year’s and two things happened. One, I started making some jewelry, started with some simple chainmail. Yup, hooked. Two, I started a new story. I didn’t quite know what was going to happen, but my characters started evolving and during that mini break from work, I crafted a chapter, passed it along to @jaybederwehl, who gave his stamp of approval that I was on the right track.

My goal is to be done with the first draft by end of year and I figure by page count (for a standard size paperback) I’m about half way there. I am currently at 47.5k words and on page 180. Whether or not the story finishes before then or not…

That’s the puzzle.

Cheers!

m

The Writers’ Addage

Write, write, write.

Pretty simple isn’t it. Yeah, well it’s easier than it seems. I’ve dreamed of being Nora, tapping out words for a weekend and “poof!” the manuscript is complete! If only (sighing dreamily, seriously). Life doesn’t seem to work out that way. Between working forty, sometimes plus, hours per week, the raising of the children, and everything else that goes along with being a part of society sometimes even a text message fulfilled my writing quota for any given day.

However cleverly I try to disguise my excuses for not writing they are purely that, excuses. There was absolutely nothing stopping me from tapping the keys at least once per week. Heck (being careful for the NSFW thing again) even a mere fifteen minutes would have accomplished the goal.

Yup.

I am a slacker.

Or at least now looking back on things, I see how easy it is to find something else- anything else to do besides write. I could have been journaling- that’s writing!!! My husband encouraged me, my kids encouraged me. Shit I watched my writing partner @jaybederwehl over at feloniousinsult.blogspot publish THREE freaking books to my none. (Insert grimace here with a side eye glance anywhere but the screen).

But, you know what? It’s okay. Regardless of the shoulda, woulda, coulda I am writing again. and HOORAH (sorry Marines) it feels good.

Writing advice tip #1 Write, write, write.

It’s true. Doesn’t have to be anything serious. Write about not writing. write a recipe, write a letter. write lists, create character names for a story that you don’t even know exists yet.

Yeah, yeah. I know. Practice what you preach. My goal is to do this daily. Who knows what y’all will end up reading, it might not be fit for public consumption… but I’m going to do it and if I can’t post for whatever reason I should know in advance and will say something.